Have you ever heard the saying, “We accept the love we think we deserve?” Personally, I know that concept all too well. Maybe you do, too? For myself, in the past, I would too often accept less than tolerable treatment from some people. At times, I would even put up with downright horrible behavior from them. And, I would receive that behavior towards me as acceptable, not even thinking I deserved something better.
There were even times when friends would say to me, “Why do you let him/her treat you that way? That’s not how you’re supposed to be treated. You’re worth so much more than that.” I would slough it off thinking that the poor conduct was all there was for me, without a hope of something better. So I would settle for less, and hang on to people who didn’t treat me with unconditional love, because I didn’t think I could have a love beyond that which I was experiencing.
I’ve thought a lot about the “why” of this. Maybe I didn’t think I was worthy of a better kind of love. Maybe I didn’t think there was anyone out there who could treat me better. Or, maybe I thought that true, unconditional love (at least among humans) was a fantasy. However, two things have changed that mindset for me. First, is the concept which we’ve talked about SO much in this blog, i.e., realizing and coming to fully know God’s immeasurable, treasured, unconditional love for me; and coming to understand how deeply and perfectly God loves me in whatever state I’m in.
By accepting God’s unbelievably fierce and gracious love for me, I have a new perspective on love, as well as a deeper understanding of the kind of love I should accept from others. Once I came to truly feel the utmost contentment in God’s never-ending love for me, I didn’t feel the need to desperately hang on to people who demonstrated hurtful conduct towards me. I also didn’t feel that I should accept hurtful treatment from people anymore.
This doesn’t mean that I am unkind towards people who are unkind to me. I still show U Love to those people as best as I can. But, it does mean that I don’t make their conditional love the foundational love for what I think I deserve in my life. My foundation for love is the perfect U Love I receive from God. It’s the model for any other love I receive in my life.
There’s more I’d like to share with you about this topic of “what kind of love do you think you deserve”…..much more that has impacted me about this subject. I’ll share all that with you next time! See you then!
Please join our U Love chain here!